Thursday, January 26, 2012

What's That Song?

Going through my blogroll this morning, one of the the authors posed the question: "What did you accomplish creatively this week?" And I was like, aw fuck. Because I couldn't think of anything. I wrote in here, which occasionally calls for me to tap the keg of my creativity, but other than that, bupkis. And I decided then and there that I always, always want to have an answer for that question. At least one creative thing per week. It doesn't sound like so much to ask, just one thing a week, but a lazy mind is a tough, tough bitch.

I go through these phases, they occur a couple of times a year, when I am keenly jealous of performers and musicians and anyone who got to go to performing arts school (here's where you start thinking, "haven't I read this before?"). This morning I may or may not have been listening to Les Mis for the hundredth time on the way into work and I got to thinking about the structure of a musical, how there's a pattern of reprises and how they all work so gorgeously and it's mystifying to me how a mind can put something together like that. How there's all these pieces that make a whole and how do you even begin? But I realized that even though I don't know dick about writing songs, I could learn that. That structure. It's like math or science in its way and though I don't remember much now, I was actually really good at math and science once. I have a fine working brain and I could help write a musical, which is something I've always wanted to do and I've been dragging my feet about for years, just ask my ever-patient brother. It's within my power to figure it out, even if I never had a chance to go to the Fame school and twirl around on cafeteria tables. Lack of training is not a valid excuse. And then my Liz Lemon muscle started flexing, thinking about while I'm at it lets jump into comedy writing! Yeah, I tend to go big when I get on my kicks. Which is why nothing ever gets done.

So one thing at a time: first, I need to get back to writing fiction. For the millionth time, just write. Finish that WIP. Even if it's one chapter a week, it's one thing to add to my creativity roster. I was thinking about this yesterday, about what I want most in this life, when I get to the end of it, and it's that I'll be remembered as a good person. A kind, loving and fun mother and wife and family member and friend above all else. I want my legacy to be of light and warmth, and that's something I hope I'm making happen day by day, just by living the way I choose to live. As long as I can do that, my life can't be considered a waste. But it wouldn't hurt to have some other accomplishments to tack on, some work with a wider impact, something I made, of which I and my family can be proud. Who knows if these creative aspirations will ever really come to pass, but yes or no it's up to me. The meat of life, as well as the gravy.

Alex Chilton inspired the Replacements and so here's my inspiration of the day.

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