Jaws V

Just when you thought you were safe from the breastfeeding talk.... Dun DUN Dun DUN Dun DUN.

You know when you're single and everyone says, "Love will happen when you stop looking," or something nauseating that you are not even hearing even if there is the remote possibility that it will turn out to be true? Well, the same "forget about it" principle apparently applies to milk production. With the safety net of formula supplementation, I've sort of let go of my milk obsession and I've been producing, if not copious extra to have on hand at all times, at least enough to feel pretty psyched about my output instead of constantly disappointed. As many of you know who have been through it, this comes with the non-desired side effect of messing up my carefully restored peaceful nursing mojo (we had to re-learn proper latching after a seemingly endless bout of thrush nipples). What's been happening for the past couple of days is that HR seems to be getting so much so fast that he pulls back and whines and treats my nipples like Stretch Armstrong. Ow for me, and I feel bad for any discomfort it causes for him. I guess there's really no way to win in the game of breastfeeding, except for, you know, the babies in the end. But that's the important thing. This blip will pass, and again it's nice to not worry about making enough. I have to think of it this way: I plan to nurse for seven more months give or take, but I get to raise this dude who makes me smile constantly for a lot longer than that so any aggravation has been worth it.

I was sure that I got the awesomest baby available since the minute he was born, maybe even before that, but he just gets more awesome by the day. By the second. When I hold him facing me now he puts his little hands on either side of my face. In his mind I guess he thinks he can hold it still so he can eat my nose off, but in my mind he's doing something unspeakably precious. In a way, we're both right.

All Baby Extravaganza!

The downside of a four-days-in-the-office week: Mondays here are insane. Nothing I can't handle, and it's nice to be busy as it makes the time go a lot faster.

HUGE news:

Early last Friday morning my first niece was born, four months to the day (almost to the minute) from HR. This is noteworthy for other reasons, such as: this is the first girl born to Mike's family in two generations (he's one of four boys, and HR has two older boy cousins) and she's been an impatient little miss, wanting to be born for some time-- as it is she's almost two months early, but thankfully everyone's doing just fine so far. Congratulations to my brother- and sister-in-law, we can't wait to meet the little one and commence with the spoiling.

Our mini-vacation with the in-laws was nice as could be, what with the excitement of the birth of the new bebe-la and then there was the matter of the weather being cooperative and everyone relaxed and had a good time. The remainder of the weekend was stuffed with goodness like a birthday party for a one-year-old and a birthday party for a forty-year-old in the same day. And I got in lots and lots of playing and laughing and snuggling with my little beast. Sundays are usually our special day together.

Today is, well, today. So I'd better get to work and make it the best today it can be.

Before I go, here's a blog o' the week: Lovely Morning. See for yourself, it really is just lovely.

Clearblue Anniversary

Today my brother turns 25. This is big, because my brother was sort of my first baby. We're ten years apart, so when he was born my sister and I (who was only five herself at the time, but a precocious five) got really involved in his raisin' up. This is a good or bad thing, depending on whether you like us. We've sort of left an imprint. It feels like I was just hauling him around in his little feety pajamas, but here he is turning 25 and getting ready to be married a year from October. Tomorrow it'll be HR, right?

Speaking of the bean (when am I not?) it was one year ago today that I found out I was pregnant with him. I had a feeling I was, but I wanted to wait a few days after my period was late before I took the test. I lasted exactly one day. When I woke at five a.m. to pee on the morning of that second day, I just had to find out. So I got Mike out of bed and and decided this was it, I was going to take the test. So I did. I think you can fill in the rest for yourself.

I'm taking off early today and taking a day off tomorrow so we can spend some time with Mike's family on their vacation in Rhode Island. Most of them haven't seen the baby in months and he's certainly gone through a lot of changes. I'm really looking forward to it.

Catch y'all next week!

Antiquated Pastimes

Just so you know, I'm going to write about music on here a lot. Not as someone who claims to be an expert or have good taste even, just as a person who loves and appreciates all kinds of music. It's always been a huge part of my life, even if all the musical talent was hogged by one person in my family and that person is not me. It's my brother. The jerk. ANYway, when we were on vacation we were sitting around the fire one night and somebody came up with the idea that we'd go around and each person would name a category, then everyone would name their most favoritist thing of that category. For example: favorite sandwich. That's easy for me: veggie sub with cheese, no onions, extra pickles, extra hots. Not so easy: favorite band. To keep it interesting, the rule was that the Beatles don't count. After a lot of thought, I decided to go with the Afghan Whigs. But it was no easy decision. Favorite band of all time? That's not even taking into account all the different genres, or emotional associations with times in your life. So difficult! Harder still, we later built upon this by going back to that old chestnut, top ten albums. After a ton of deliberation, I produced, in no particular order:

Kick - INXS
Pinkerton - Weezer
Low End Theory - A Tribe Called Quest
Purple Rain - Prince
Tapestry - Carole King
Grace - Jeff Buckley
Gentlemen - Afghan Whigs
Obligatory Beatles pick - Revolver
I'm Still In Love With You - Al Green
Maybe the first Scissor Sisters record?

Ack, too much pressure! I didn't even get a Ween pick on there because I can't choose. Clearly this list will be ever evolving. But it's a hell of a conversation starter, assuming all the people in the conversation understand the concept of an "album."

I have too much work to do to be playing around on here any longer. But if you'd like to share your list I'd love to see it!

Foodstuffs

When I was a kid, I LOOOVED Pop-Tarts and Ding-Dongs and Little Debbies. It's ridiculous, because my mom is an amazing baker and we had cookies and squares and things she made from scratch around all the time. I was spoiled with the good stuff, and I preferred the bad stuff because it was exotic. My friends whose family members didn't bake thought I was crazy. There was another aspect to it too, and it was that my grandmother, the baked goods nazi, always lived with us and to this day she swears she can always tell whether something's made from a boxed mix. I believe it. Because of this my mother and I shared an illicit love of boxed cake and canned frosting - when Gram went away we'd take the opportunity to get down with the Pillsbury like it was cigarettes or dirty magazines.

I bring this up because lately I've been craving Pop-Tarts or Ding-Dongs or Little Debbies or some chemical-y, preservative laden, mass-produced sweet thing. No, I'm not pregnant again. It's just one of those things. And it's just going to get stronger and stronger until I give in to it so I should probably go buy myself a box and be done with it. I know all I need is one and it'll take care of the jones, and I can put the rest in the freezer for future "emergencies." I'm lucky I don't have issues with food, food and I have a healthy relationship. I know what good food tastes like, and when I eat something crappy and inferior it turns out to hardly ever be worth it. It doesn't taste as good as I was thinking it would, and it reminds me that I could make myself a cake in an hour from fresh ingredients and it would be a hundred times more delicious. When I was younger, though, I'm not sure I had the palate to tell the difference and it seems such a waste in retrospect. But then again I also loved vegetables - I was the only one who liked brussels sprouts and a box of those was a treat.

I guess I'm thinking about all this because I hope that HR will grow up with an appreciation of good food, and we'll give him the best start we can and not encourage any picky tendencies. Some kids just aren't great eaters, though, I accept that. We'll deal with it when the time comes. I'm just happy to be living in a time where there's so much awareness of nutrition and locally produced and organic foods and less emphasis on technology and convenience. My parents did the best they could with us, nutrition-wise, but it was a different time, and we didn't exactly have the money to go all out for the best fresh items (it's still an issue for many families these days). Plus even with all the bounty we kids were still all, "A pox on your humble brownies! Get that sugary plastic-wrapped stuff we saw on TV in our bellies!"

I don't plan to make junk food a regular thing, but I won't hide its existence or deny a bit on occasion to my little guy because I know from experience that naughtiness is the ingredient that makes it more appealing than it actually is. And even though my strawberry-frosted loving self eventually grew up to appreciate the real quality stuff, I still get these cravings. The important thing is to strike the balance. Balance in all things, that's my ultimate goal. Maybe I should have called this blog Moderationberry Pie?

You Know That I'll Be Back

I'm sorry for anyone who is on vacation this week, but I'm digging the rain. The trees and things need it, it washes away the troublesome pollen, and it's given me a chance to do things such as put pants on my baby. Not to rob him of the joy of pantslessness when he's got a lifetime of pants wearing ahead of him, but he's got so many nice things he's in danger of outgrowing before he gets a chance to wear them, it's nice if they make it onto his body at least once before being passed down the line.

Ah, my petit bonhomme, he is full of beans lately. He's been backsliding a bit in his sleep habits (boo) but he makes up for it in other types of development (yay) such as keeping up a constant stream of jabber. We have pretend conversations all day long and it is THE awesomeness. I said my first word at five months and spoke in full sentences by my first birthday, but I'm not sure that's the sort of thing that's hereditary. I think this is just what babies do at this stage and is no indicator that he'll be an early talker. I don't even care about that, I'm just enjoying the expressive nonsense coming out of his mouth. Anyway, you know I think any little thing he does is the bees knees-- I still high five him for producing an especially impressive shart. HR will be four months on Friday, and can you even believe it? This one has definitely gone by the fastest so far.

This past weekend was full of friends, which is so great because I feel like we haven't socialized with other non-related adults for a long time. Two friends were in from Vermont with their beautiful five-month-old daughter, and though we mostly talked about the ups and downs of new parenthood, it was a treat. Yesterday Mike worked the brunch shift and I joined my best friend and her husband at the restaurant where he works to catch up over biscuits and sausage gravy. We live about 100 yards from one another, but lately if we see each other once a week we're doing well so we really have to take advantage of these opportunities to get together, especially since they're about to bring a little dude or dudette into the world in a couple of months.

Ooh yes, Blog of the Week: Lois Lowry (author of The Giver, the Anastasia Krupnik series, and approximately one million other excellent books) is one of my writing heroines and her blog--which offers a glimpse into her thoughts and private life as well the occasional post on her writing process--is fantastic.

I was just telling my brother that I heard Mark Morris's "Return of the Mack" on my drive in this morning and it took care of my Monday blues before I really caught them. This is admittedly an awful piece of pop music, but it holds a nostalgic place in my heart and its airing was perfectly timed. What have you heard recently that rearranged your whole mindset?

Conundrum

Work-from-home day, LOTS to do. Baby and Dada are taking a morning nap on the couch and this is the perfect time to get down to business. But they are so beautiful all snoozy and snuggly I can't stop staring at them. Somebody get me some blinders, STAT. I could write them off as a professional expense, right?